How To: Skin A Cat

Growing up in somewhat rural Ohio you come to learn a lot of colloquial phrases and words. "Crick (as in creek), boosh (as in bush), warsh (as in wash), where's it at (as in where is it), etc. etc. You get the point. One phrase I love that I've heard growing up, though it may not be as colloquial as I once thought, is "There's more than one way to skin a cat." Admittedly, I like it for its inappropriateness, not it's meaning. But that doesn't mean that it doesn't hold meaning for me.

I've come to learn through my high school, college, and military experience that there's always more one way to skin the cat. That is, there are many paths to the same destination. I don't know why people don't just use that turn of phrase, it's much more inspirational and doesn't invoke the thought of pre-cooked Chinese food. It's often the journey we relish in anyway, not the final destination, so I guess in life it makes more sense to have more paths and fewer destinations.

But how do you skin the cat?

Well in the military we have a phrase for it, but in keeping in line with the original ground rules I shan't write it because it would invoke some awful curse words. Instead, let's just say that you fiddle faddle around until you find something that works... and then refine your process along the way. Everyone's fiddling may not be the same but their faddles usually match up.

My point is this... and I'm feeling rather bold with this so bear with me for this me-centric point... each gay comes out in his or her own way. While I love to give advice and share my story, each of you out there seeking advice has to find your own path. Yes mine had shouts, tears, hugs, and eventually acceptance, but it took time to get there. It took me trying something new when something old failed time and time again. The way I skinned my cat is going to be different from the way you'll skin yours. If you're trying to get to where you want to be and are currently losing in the battle you're fighting the only way to win is to change your tactics. Wow. I'm fairly sure there were a few analogies smashed together there, but I think you get the point. You have to change things if you want them to change. You've got to try skinning the cat a different way.

So to those silent readers, to the ones that comment, and the ones that message me privately; try skinning your cat, ask for advice, but ultimately do it your way. You'll be fine. It's scary, but you'll be just fine.